Last night, after a few days of working on preparing the binary and weeks of debugging, testing, and finalizing… and months of hard work, I was able to submit version 2.0 to the store. And, of course, the two other apps affectionately called Desk MD (Markdown) and Desk NT (Notetaking).
I took a moment to reflect on this important moment and I got a bit emotional as the last few months of my life have been anything but easy.
In short, in the last few months I had moved my family of 4 from Atlanta to San Francisco, (a huge project in its own right – we moved 3 times and will move again in 4 months…!), joined an early stage startup that imploded within 57 days (I left), and attempted another small indie project (it’s 99% done) all while thinking through the next stage of the Desk project.
Trying to “do” life amidst all these changes has been difficult and I’ve battled depression and anxiety and a host of other things as I try to make it through each day. I’ve had moments where I’ve just wanted to quit it all and disappear from the planet (at least the digital one) and take up something entirely different (e.g. woodworking). Just start from scratch.
But then I remember the good times, the reasons why I do what I do, and how unbelievably lucky and fortunate I am to be alive. I am seriously blessed (and so are you), I just need to find times to remember how good I’ve got it and be grateful for all that I have.
The reality is that we’ll never “be” there completely and we’ll always be “almost there” at our very best, but I think that’s okay. It’ll be a long road regardless; it’s all about how we see the journey while we’re on it.