Part of growing up is understanding more what friendship is and what it is not. And, it’s about understanding what you can personally handle and what you definitely cannot handle.
In an ever increasing connected world it’s still impossible to know entirely what you’re getting into when it comes to new relationships. There’s no “pre-work” or “Read the Manual” on each of us and certainly no “TL;DR” on folks that we encounter.
The only way is to simply engage and it can be gross and nasty and disturbing and scary. It can also be some of the best decisions of your life. Risk, at every turn, for these types of things and, on occasion, you’ll find one or two that’ll go the distance.
The rest will head somewhere else, just like you will. But if you wait for the warning signs or try to do any form of “due diligence” without engaging then you’ll never quite get there.
And that’ll be your loss.